


She Is Everything And More (She Is Home To Me)

by BroodyJC



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, Slight Canon Divergence, aka mon-el never came back, i started writing this before he reappeared and was too lazy to put it in here, sorry - Freeform, there are tropes because what is a story without tropes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-13 02:57:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12974319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BroodyJC/pseuds/BroodyJC
Summary: Her eyes speak a thousand words she couldn’t say, choosing her words carefully until she settles with “You love my daughter, don’t you?”And she’s taken aback, because it shouldn’t be this obvious. She shouldn’t know. No one was supposed to know. Well, Lena had just found out herself, with the warmth that took over her chest last night when Kara didn’t think twice before hugging her by the waist and tugging her closer.Sometimes, being ignorant was the best way of self-preservation. She lusted the moments before she knew, she lusted being able to put those thoughts back, to just be. Because now that she knew, she couldn’t unsee it.There was something on Eliza’s knowing smile that almost made it too easy blurting out the truth, blurting out that love was too little of an emotion for what she felt. But she knew better than that.“She’s my best friend.” The words sound wrong to her ears, they taste bad on her tongue. “Of course I love her.”“You know that’s not what I meant.”ORThe first time Kara takes Lena to Midvale





	She Is Everything And More (She Is Home To Me)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ratherembarrassing](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ratherembarrassing/gifts).



> Just wanted to thank this blessed soul that wrote the prompts and say that I loved them both and hope I did justice on this one

Lena should’ve said no. 

It’s actually really simple once she stops to think about it. She just had to say “no”. And she wanted to say it, the word was already at the tip of her tongue. But she made the mistake of looking into pleading eyes and that stupid pout, and the word “no” was still in her mind. She found the word “yes” slipping from her lips instead. 

It’s the only reason she finds herself retrieving a bunch of clothes from the back of her closet because Kara insisted on “packing comfy”. And sue her if her only comfortable clothes were from her time during college.  

Faded jeans from her time back on freshman year, sweaters she doesn’t even remember buying, shirts she was sure once belonged to Lex and maybe one or two from Jack, her National City University hoodie she bought as a joke on her last year there. She even shoved a pair of flip flops for good measure. Not that she would ever wear them. Ever. 

Kara Danvers and her stupid not good enough excuses (because saying  _I’ll be all alone because Alex will take Maggie and James will be with Winn and I just don’t want to be_ _on_ _my_ _own the w_ _hole_ _weekend_ was not good enough) are the only reasons she’s packing a duffle bag at Thursday night. A weekday. A  _work_  day. 

Hours she could be using to go over the inhuman amount of contracts she had to sign, both for L-Corp and CatCo. Precious hours she’s wasting to look for clothes she hasn’t seen in years, just to make Kara smile. 

Kara Danvers and that stupid smile were the reason after all.  

Which reminds her of why Kara had asked in the first place. Lena sighs, takes her phone.  

Kara Danvers was the reason her last Google search was “How much can you spend on a present for someone else’s mother?”. 

** 

“I’m sorry they demanded your presence.” Sam’s voice is as apologetic as one can be and it’s all it takes to prompt a single wave from Lena as she settles down in one of the uncomfortable chairs. Feels good to know Sam keeps at least some of her old habits, getting everyone and anyone unsettled, even if it’s only physical. “They wouldn’t let go.” 

“Well, I can’t say that a meeting through all morning was my ideal Friday, but shutting down old, white, misogynistic men improved my mood.” 

Sam takes her seat behind the desk, a board smile on her lips and a simple nod moving her head. 

Lena takes a moment to look at the CFO, from the matching gray blazer and trousers, to the red button up, stopping at the relaxed shoulders and soft expression she was sporting. Lena thinks this place really suits Sam.  

She wonders how can one change so fast, and forces her own shoulders down, forces a deep breath in. 

“Lucky Kara.” Lena raises an eyebrow at her, Sam does the same, they share a quick smile. “How did Kara convinced the so busy CEO to take four days off?” 

“I came into work on Friday and I’ll be back Monday evening. That’s hardly four days.” 

“You don’t sound like the Lena Luthor I know. So? What did she say?” 

“She asked.” 

And Sam stares at her, tries to see the woman behind the blank expression, but there’s still that soft, little smile at the corner of Lena’s lips, so she knows there’s nothing but truth in her words. 

“Let me get this straight: she asked. And that was all the convincing you needed? You’re going back to her home town, pilling up work, to celebrate her mother’s, a woman you don’t actually know, birthday, because she asked you to?” 

“It sounds insane when you put it like that.” 

“You were the one who said it. I didn’t call you insane.” 

Lena chuckles at that, her eyes lingering on her own watch. Slowly, she gets up, takes her (Alex’s really) duffle bag and heads to the door. 

“Thanks again for letting me borrow your office, Sam.” 

“It’s still yours, Lena. You’re my boss.” Lena’s hand lingers at the handle, eyes bored on Sam’s face until she receives an encouraging nod. “Have fun with your… Kara. Have fun with Kara.” 

“Don’t work too hard, Miss Arias.”  

Sam waits for the sound of heels fade before going back to work.  

Her employers look weirdly at her. She realizes it during her ride down the elevator and she feels all set of eyes on her. On her hands. As if they knew whatever she was doing, as if their suspicions were growing and they couldn’t hold back. 

So, when it finally stops and the doors open, she is the first one to move, to cross the lobby with confident steps and only a slight bounce provided by the bag rhythmically hitting her ankle. Still, it all seems too much. With every person watching her and the spacious lobby suddenly too small.  

Lena doesn’t stop. She nods at anyone who locks eyes with her and even smiles at one of the doormen when she’s finally out.  

It’s quite chilly, she notices first, not at all strange during the end of winter, even welcoming the way her lungs burn as she breathes.  

The second thing she notices is the black SUV haphazardly parked right in front of the company. 

The third and final thing, the one that makes her stop dead in her tracks, is the blonde woman casually leaning against it, arms crossed in front of her chest and a serious expression on her face. The stance lasts until she looks around and sees Lena, a huge grin taking over instead as she comes closer. 

“I’m pretty sure those are not comfortable.” Kara reaches over to take the bag from her hand and Lena feels herself blush under the once over. “I’m pretty sure heels and power suits aren’t the definition of comfy.” 

“I wasn’t about to leave L-Corp in jeans and a hoodie. I have an image to uphold.” 

“You actually packed jeans and a hoodie? You actually have jeans and a hoodie?" Kara laughs, Lena doesn't find it in herself to be mad after the sound. "Come on, we have a nine-hour long drive and we have at least two stops to make.” 

Lena doesn’t spare another word before following Kara. The door is opened for her, the leather seats clean, not a single paper out of its place. Lena raises an skeptical eyebrow at Kara.  

“Did you rent a car? You could’ve asked me.” 

“It’s Alex’s. They went on James’ car and she let me borrow it.” 

“Doesn’t Alex own a bike?”  

“We are on a tight schedule, stop questioning me.” Lena snorts, which she would absolutely deny if anyone asked, and takes a step closer to the car. 

“You’re driving?” 

“I can drive, Lena.” 

“Whatever you say.” 

“I only took the license test three times, okay? I can drive! And on that second time, that old lady shouldn’t be there!” 

“We are on a tight schedule, Kara, stop arguing with me.” 

Eleven minutes into the trip, Lena turns the radio off for the total displeasure of Kara Danvers.  

It’s going to be nine long hours. 

** 

They are late. They are an hour and twenty-two minutes late and there's only one person to blame: Kara. 

But then again, all it took was a "please" and a pout, and Lena couldn't say no. That's not entirely her fault, even Alex had a hard time telling Kara no and they've been sisters for over a decade. But her inability to deny anything would be her downfall. At least when it came to Kara. So, there was one person to blame: herself. 

When Kara takes one last turn left, Lena releases her hold on the seatbelt (Kara  _was_  a bad driver, terrible even, and she couldn't be more relieved that Maggie would be driving them back) and takes a deep breath.  

“I may have taken the driver’s license test four times.” 

“No shit.” 

“Or five.” 

“It doesn’t surprise me.” Kara chuckles, Lena joins in a beat later. "I'm just glad it's over." 

"Hey!" 

They come to a rather abrupt stop in front of, what Lena suspects, is Eliza's home.  

It's a two-story house, high white fences around it, a simple gravel path leading to the uncovered garage with two parked cars taking all of its space, a yard that seemed to extend until the back of the house and, surely, Lena could see Kara Danvers growing up in the epitome of middle class suburban home. 

She wonders now how many things from Kara she will be able to learn, how many things she’s yet to learn. She looks at Kara, who’s already leaving the car and going to the trunk, and she knows there’s much she’ll never understand. 

She’s much less enthusiastic to leave the car, maybe because of the strange mix of tiredness and nervousness, but she forces her head up nevertheless and follows Kara. And, perhaps, the nervousness is dissipating, giving space to her body to feel how tired she actually is. At the moment, any surface would be appropriate for her. She’s not entirely proud of that. 

Eliza Danvers, she learns, is as sweet as Kara and, at the same time, as terrifying as Alex. Maybe it was the terrorized idea of meeting Kara’s mother, a person she’s not sure where she stands with even after all of Kara’s friends taking her in, or maybe it’s the fear of doing something wrong, the fear of not being enough for yet another mother. 

“Mom, this is Lena Luthor.” And with a push on her lower back, she’s standing barely two feet away from Eliza. “Lena, this is my mom, Eliza.” 

It’s excruciating, to say at least. The hard gaze she’s met with is not one she’s unused to, it’s the same gaze everyone looks at her, to see how long it’ll take her to break. She never does. 

Somehow, she thinks that blue eyes, much like Kara’s in a weird sense, will be the first ones to achieve such accomplishment. Instead, they turn warm and, then, warmer when a smiles makes itself noticed. 

“Make yourself at home, honey.” She doesn’t know at who it’s directed, but, by the grin on Kara’s face, she has a suspicion. “Let's get you two settled.” 

It takes her thirty minutes, after Kara urged her to the bathroom at the first floor with a change of clothes, a towel and instructions to her bedroom.  

She takes her time, her movements slow as she takes off her heels, the aching on her ankles settling down at the lack of pressure; untucking her button-down from the hem of her slacks, she relents on the feeling of fabric moving against her skin and she feels the CEO stance leaving her face a little more at every drop of clothes and at the motion of retrieving her contacts; fingers moving up to retreat the pins that held her hair in a tight bun, which has caused her an headache in hour two of the drive, and set it free; she welcomes the feeling of warm water hitting her back, her collarbones, her neck. At the end, it's hard leaving the relaxed state she found in there. 

Even after she’s out, dirty clothes pressed to her chest as she takes her surroundings, she takes her time. As she looks at the walls, she can’t help but remember about her own house and the one previous to that, the bare, white walls, the minimalist furniture and the lack of the feeling of a place that was lived in. Except, of course, for the simple frame of herself and Kara, sitting securely on one of her book shelves. 

Lena doesn’t dare to stare at the family pictures on the wall, she knows what she’ll find. She’s not sure she wants to see it, the reminder of the father Kara lost just after she got him. A reminder that herself and Kara had more than a few things in common. 

At the top of the stairs, she turns left, as Kara instructed, to be met with an empty hallway. She stops at the first door to the right, painted in simple, worn out white, and gets in.  

The bedroom is... not what Lena had expected. She had expected light blue and green walls, shelves filled with books, trophies for whatever fair Kara had participated, pictures of young Alex and Kara. The last ones were there, hanging on red and yellow walls among painted canvas, but they were accompanied by more recent photographs.  

She takes a step closer to them, the blurred silhouettes making her attempts of distinguishing who they are harder. It takes her a minute, but she sees it. Lucy, Alex, James, Maggie, Winn. Herself. She takes a look closer, it's a picture she has never seen before. At it, she's laughing sitting in, she bets, Kara's couch on a game night, her hair down and head thrown back. She looks carefree, young. She wonders how Kara got that one.  

The door opens and clicks shut behind her, she doesn't move. Kara stands on her side, it doesn't take her long to talk after that. 

"You looked different that night." 

"Should I take that as a compliment?" 

"You should." Kara chuckles, Lena turns to face her. "Last time I came home I hanged them here. It felt right having the most important people in my life around me, I don't know. Sounds a little silly when I say it out loud." 

"But it's not." Lena reaches out, holds Kara's forearm. "It's flattering. Really. And the paintings?" 

"It's what I remember from-" She never finishes it, she pushes her glasses up instead, as if to keep her grounded, and lets out a small sigh. "It was home." 

Lena tears her gaze away, a feeling of wrongness taking over the pit of her stomach. It felt wrong learning about Kara's past when it wasn't told by the woman herself. 

"Well, anyway, I just came here to make sure you have everything you need for the night." 

"What do you mean?" Kara takes a step back towards the door, already ready to leave the room. 

"The rooms is yours, I'm sleeping on the couch." 

"Don't be ridiculous, Kara. It's your house, I'll go to the couch." She's already shaking her head even before Lena finishes her last sentence. "Then we don't have an agreement. I'm not kicking you out of your old bedroom." 

They stare at each other for a minute and when Kara drops her shoulders, Lena knows she has won. She's already moving back to retrieve a duvet and a pillow when Kara speaks again. 

"We could share, I mean, the bed is big enough for two and we've fallen asleep on the same couch before, it can't be that different, right?" 

As a matter of fact, it is. 

She ends up laying on her back, body completely stilled and hands folded across her stomach. She doesn't dare to move, neither does Kara by the lack of movement to her left. 

Until, of course, Kara rolls to her side, drops an arm around Lena's middle and whispers "Do you mind?". She shakes her head slightly, but Kara's apparent comfort is enough to make her relax. 

If they wake up next morning tangled from the waist down, they don't mention it.  

** 

Alex developed the habit of waking up early on the weekends during her teenager years. It had started a couple of weeks after her father’s death, when Eliza was too busy with work and someone had to take responsibility.  

The fact that Kara couldn’t wake up before ten to save her life made the choice a little more obvious for them. And a few months were all it took for Alex to start actually  _liking_  it. As much as anyone possibly could. 

Somehow she found herself looking forward to it. After discovering the quietness during the mornings, the absence of fights for the remote, time to make an actual breakfast, the peace to read while watching the sunrise. Alex ended up liking it way more than any teenager should. 

So, when she wakes up a little over fifteen before seven, she doesn’t complain before getting up. Even though, leaving Maggie clutching at the pillow she was once resting  will probably be her hardest decision on the day. 

With an over lasting stretch, Alex crosses the hall, the idea of finding an empty, silent house warming her up enough to keep her going. She thinks about what it will be like once they all wake up, with Maggie, Winn and James talking way too loudly, her mom and her sister with way too excited tones, Kara trying to show Lena around in a couple of days. 

Lena. Alex actually stops at the thought. She had arrived last night with Kara, after everyone had found their bedrooms, and Alex would bet she was already up. Alex doubts Lena would take lazy mornings no matter how much Kara pouted. 

When she reaches the first flight of stairs, her suspicions are confirmed: Lena sitting by the corner of the dining room table, in a soft looking pair of pajama pants and a simple too big shirt, nursing a mug of coffee.  

She looks young, without the weight of carrying a company that made too many mistakes in the past, and Alex is struck with the reminder that this woman is barely twenty five. Alex almost breaks the moment, the need to make her presence known instead of scaring the woman growing faster. But she doesn’t move. Not when she notices the second person on the first floor. 

Kara appears, two plates with a pack of pancakes on each, barely holding the bottle of maple syrup between her teeth. Honestly? Alex is going to scream so hard at her later. Instead, right now, she can only stare, mouth slightly ajar.  

Her sister is awake, not only awake but making breakfast for someone else other than herself. While smiling.  

She watches as Lena chuckles and retrieves the bottle from Kara with a small shake of her head. And watches as Kara runs back to the kitchen and Lena uses the seconds she has to slip three of her own pancakes into Kara’s plate. And watches as Kara finally settles down with her mug of cocoa (Alex doesn’t even doubt what her sister will be drinking) and the pot of coffee for Lena, who accepts it with a grateful, small smile. 

Maggie was right. Her sister got it bad. 

“Morning.” She says as she steps down, both pair of eyes coming to lock on her. Kara grins with her face stuffed, Lena manages to be more polite, with a nod and offer for coffee. “How was the drive?” 

“Tiring.” Lena answers after she went to the kitchen, fingers eager after her own mug. 

She hears a chuckle, cutlery clinking and rushed whispered words. 

“There is pancake dough by the stove.” And Alex is sure, just by her sister’s tone, Lena had forced her to say it. 

It takes her eight minutes. Exactly eight minutes to go back into the dining room, her own breakfast in hands and eyes trained on the two. When she settles down, she sees Lena sliding her plate with her last two pancakes over to Kara, who doesn’t even think twice before stuffing her face again.  

Alex raises an eyebrow at the fond smile on Lena’s lips, they look at each other and the younger woman blushes before finishing her drink. 

** 

"I told you not to wear heels." Kara states simply after another one of their stops because of an almost fall from Lena, prevented only by Kara's arm around her waist. 

Twenty minutes ago, it hadn't been there. Also, twenty minutes ago, Lena's feet hadn't slipped even once.  

And then, it happened for the first time, nothing but a bounce on her walk and a mumbled curse under her breath. It didn't take more than an offer of her right forearm and a firm grip on it for Lena to regain her balance, and keep walking. The hand never left its place. 

It proved to be the right choice when she slipped again two blocks down. The chuckle was almost bursting out of her lips when Lena just looked at her, green being replaced by a light gray because of the lighting, or lack thereof. She couldn't bring herself to laugh anymore. Instead, her arm had snuck around a thin waist and flushed Lena's side against hers.  

Lena had taken solace on it, then. With her head resting on Kara's shoulder and slow steps down the streets, they had walked for longer than Lena could count. She didn't mind, not when Kara's fingers started drawing patterns against the fabric on the side of her coat. For once, she felt completely and utterly relaxed. The rhythmic beat of heart proved it. 

"I refuse to wear flip flops. You'll never see me in one." 

"Well, I was thinking about sneakers, but I bet I can change your mind." 

Kara doesn't try to hold the conversation for longer, and appreciates the fact that Lena seems to share her wish. Especially so, when Lena snuggles closer, and hesitantly puts one of her arms on the same position as Kara's. 

Still, she can't help but take one last disapproving glance at the pair of black high heels at Lena's feet.  

She tries to ignore it, she really does. She tries to keep her mind on the welcomed cold wind, so different from National City, tries to point out all of the changes from her so well-known path from home. She finds out she can't.  

Because the clicking of heels gets too high and she just can't numb the super-hearing. Not with this. Not when Lena curses under her breath one more time and winces, actually winces, after another step. 

"I could carry you." It's out of her mouth before she realizes it. Lena raises an eyebrow at her, that single change on her expression speaking volumes, and smirks. 

"As tempting as the offer sounds, I'm afraid I'm a little too old for piggyback rides." 

"Then, please Lena, take them off. You're gonna end up hurting your feet." 

Lena halts their movement, the arm around Kara easily sliding against the fabric of her sweater until it settled around her wrist. She looked forward, since, because of the so offensive heels in Kara's opinion, they were the same height, and tried her best reassuring smile. 

For the look on Kara's face, it hadn't worked out that well.  

"I appreciate the concern, but, Kara, I have an image to keep." 

"You don't have to be CEO Lena Luthor around me." Kara knows she's won just from the drop on Lena's shoulders and the visible sigh. She pushes just a tiny more, bright smile full on display. "I'll even join you." 

With secured heels on Lena's right hand and the left back into place around her, they go back to walking a couple of minutes later. She keeps her promise, pair of shoes being carried in her own hand, as she uses the other to keep Lena flushed at her side. 

There was a time, Kara remembers, that was the hardest for her to try and pretend how satisfied she was at settling down. There was a time, even before that, she wondered what a close friendship was like.  

She looks at Lena, all flushed cheeks from the cold and still muttering under her breath every once in a while, and she knows she doesn't have to wonder anymore. It only meant that she had to try her hardest to pretend the close friendship was all she has ever wanted with Lena.  

They stop at the block of Kara's old school. It's much the same, blue bricks with peeled paint, grass that has seen better days and a gray steel double door at the entrance. She takes a right turn, bringing Lena closer to her and continue walking. 

"Where are you taking me, Kara?" 

"It's a surprise." 

It doesn't take long after that. Five more minutes and they are standing next to a low wood fence delimiting the edges to the hillsides and the Midvale largest lake on the middle of the plain field. 

"We walked forty-five minutes for a lake?" 

Kara wants to laugh at the disbelieving tone on Lena's voice. She nudges, her side instead.  

"It only took that long because you wore heels. And, for your instance, it's an ice-skating ring." 

"It's not frozen." 

"Maybe we are a month too late for the ice-skating season, but it's not why I brought you here." Kara shoves her free hand on her pocket, if only to hide the shakiness of her fingers. "This used to be the place everyone went out on dates, it's beautiful during winter." 

"And young Kara Danvers had lots of dates here." Kara actually laughs at the teasing tone this time. 

"I've never been here with someone. Not until you." She feels the blood running to her cheeks, hopes Lena shakes it off as being the cold. She hears a low gasp, followed by a clearance of her throat. "I guess there's no one rather than you I'd like to share this memory with." 

 _Maybe because that's the only way I know how to tell you I'm in love with you_ , she thinks. She never says it out loud. Seemed like she was a coward, after all. 

They don't talk anymore after that. Not as they stared down while Lena clutched at her coat for warmth, not when they took an even longer path back to the house. 

(Not that Lena would ever admit it, but she had accepted the piggyback ride on the last couple of blocks.) 

** 

That afternoon, Alex comes down the stairs after a shower ( _not_ with Maggie, and said woman was _definitely_ not still under running hot water) to find Lena Luthor, legs tucked under herself and thick book in one hand, sitting on the living room couch with Kara Danvers lying down, head resting on Lena’s lap.  

It’s the first time she sees them this way, not with all the intimate touches, no, she was there during the shared looks and the hand holding during movie nights. What she had yet to see was the look on their faces when the other wouldn’t be able to see. Again, she sure had seen the stolen glances on both parts, but it was never as intense or as long as this. 

Because Lena, dear God, Lena wasn’t even making much effort to pretend her eyes were focused on the words written on the pages. Instead, her eyes trace the lines on Kara’s face with such reverence that makes Alex take a breath longer.  

She is unsure someone has ever loved her sister that much. And, in some way, she is glad this person is Lena.  

She may stare a bit too long, or maybe time just passes too fast, because sooner than she anticipated, fingers assume the place eyes once looked. The touch seemed so light, just the pads touching smooth skin along her cheek, her temple, her forehead, her brow. The glasses sat untouched on the bridge of Kara’s nose. Alex stares long enough to see the small tug of lips on Lena’s face, a smile she had never seen. 

Maybe that was the effect of having Kara Danvers on their lives. And, as she looks at her sister, as peaceful as she has ever been, she wonders what effect having Lena Luthor on Kara’s life they would all have. 

“I didn’t see you there.” Alex snaps her eyes back to Lena, who now had her fingers stilled, but the soft expression had yet to leave her face. 

“I didn’t mean to startle you.” 

“You didn’t.” 

Alex doesn’t know what to say next, and it seems that neither does Lena, so she forces her eyes back to the book. She never turns the pages, her fingers find Kara’s hair instead. 

“I could take her upstairs if you wanted.” 

Lena looks puzzled for a second, before she shakes her head and lets out a small chuckle. 

“It’s okay. It’s not the first time.” The pause makes Alex wonder if she would continue, if they had more words to share even though the feeling of invading something so personal grew stronger at every heartbeat. “Kara tends to be the first one to fall asleep on movie nights, she claims I’m a great pillow.” 

Her chuckle is low, but it’s enough to make her sister stir. Both pair of eyes turn at her, hand coming up to wrap around the hem of Lena’s shirt. 

“Did I wake you?”  

And, yes, Alex might have seen the soft side of Lena Luthor when they talked, she might have seen the woman without walls guarding her every movement, but she hadn’t seen the woman she became when Kara was around. 

It was a whole new level of discovery. It was an experience she never thought she would be able to see. How a woman became so different, as if Kara had handed her a new universe just by smiling sleepily at her.  

Maybe Kara had. Because Kara had seen Lena Luthor as Lena, that itself was another reality to the woman. Yes, maybe Kara gave her another universe. 

“Mmmh. ‘S okay.” 

And Kara turns on her side, buries her face on Lena’s stomach and lets out a shaky breath. 

Maybe Lena had given Kara a universe too. One where she could be just Kara.  

Maybe sharing this, a place where no last names nor titles were needed, was what her sister needed all along. 

Alex had never been more glad for a person on Kara’s life.  

** 

Lena’s last experience in a family dinner wasn’t exactly, well, pleasant. That being said, not so pleasant was an understatement for the hell that surfaced on the last time she was put together with Lillian and Lex for more than an hour. 

It had happened before Lex’s downfall. It didn’t mean he hadn’t already lost him mind. Because he had. She just had been too blind to see it.  

Sometimes, she thinks she should've been more aware of the signs, she should've paid more attention to the details. Other times, she just wonders if it had already been too late. Most nights, she thinks that nothing could've stopped him back then. 

Family dinner four years ago hadn’t been an experience she would like to repeat. Hearing her mother’s speeches and her brother’s plans for Luthor Corp for two hours before she snapped and left were not her number one choice on how to spend her evening. 

That said, she couldn’t help but feel a little wary of dinner with the Danvers. And Kara’s reassurances were little to no help at all. Still, the uneasiness on her chest diminishes at every smile from Eliza, or the light banter between Maggie and Kara, or at the very appreciated motion of Alex getting her a glass of wine.  

Still, she can’t quite hide the shakiness of her fingers and, by the way Kara comes closer to her as they set the table and rests her hand against her lower back, Kara can sense it too. She forces a smile out, leans a little more against lips that had found her temple and sighs. 

“If it gets too much, please tell me and we’ll go upstairs.” Kara whispers, Lena tries to fight the shudder down her spine. “I know we can get kind of intense.” 

“Thank you.” Her words are soft and low, but Kara hears it anyway and her only response is to leave another kiss at Lena’s forehead. 

Her heart rate does not decrease, though. She’s not sure whether it’s because of the proximity, since sharing her personal space is not something she’s very fond of, or because of the fact she’s not entirely too comfortable yet. 

“Come on, we always give the presents before dinner.” 

That’s how, on a Saturday evening, she finds herself squished between her best friend and the armrest of the couch as she watches everyone slowly getting up to hug Eliza and nurses her second glass of that bottle of wine she’s been sharing with Alex.  

She had laughed at the nervousness on Maggie’s face as she handed her joint gift with Winn and James and the pleased expression on Eliza’s face at the words stumbled out “It’s for the next time you’re in National City for more than a couple of days. It’s the best spa we could find”. 

And she couldn’t help but send Kara a warm smile when she and her sister got up to embrace their mother and show her the simple golden necklace with a photo pendant and said “That’s our last family picture, when dad was still around”. 

Suddenly, the card on her back pocket feels wrong. But she can’t back away when Kara is by her side again, hand desperately trying to find Lena’s. And she lets her, wraps their fingers together and leans her head against Kara’s shoulder. It feels nice until she has to ignore the tilt of Alex’s head and the excruciating gaze. 

“Guess it’s my turn now.” With one last reassuring squeeze, Lena gets up and takes the card out. “I know it’s not much, but Kara mentioned your interest on bioengineering and L-Corp is making some progress in the area. So, next time you’re around just handle this over to reception and one of our doctors will accompany you through ours labs.” 

“That’s very sweet of you, Lena. Kara told me how protective you are of your company, so it means a lot.” 

“It’s nothing, really.” Eliza grabs lightly at her wrist and runs the pad of her thumb against its inside. “Happy birthday, Eliza.” 

“Thank you, sweetie.” 

Lena turns around to be met with five bright smiles. 

Perhaps family dinner’s aren’t that bad.  

** 

Eliza had had the opportunity of seeing her daughter fall in love; seeing someone else fall for her daughter; seeing love nourish when the time just wasn’t right. 

When Kara was fifteen, she was asked to prom by a senior. Alex had given him the answer instead. But Kara was relentless and it was the first time Eliza understood Alex could never say no to her sister. Like that, Alex was going with her friends, Kara, with her date.  

When the boy had arrived, five minutes before he was supposed to, Alex had only stared. Eliza never mentioned how they arrived two hours later, Kara with red eyes and Alex’s arm wrapped tightly around her shoulders. She hates to think about how that was Kara’s first heartbreak.  

She still remembers how, shortly after meeting Winn, how Kara had called and spent half an hour about how amazing her new friend was, until maybe a week later when she called again to tell her Winn had tried to kiss her. And she was there at every phone call as they worked it out. Now she knows Winn, she’s never been more grateful for what they shared because it brought them closer.  

Cat Grant’s son came after that. She never had the chance of meeting him, she had to create her opinion on him by what Kara and Alex decided to tell her. Somehow, she was captivated. He sounded nice, and after every call from Kara she knew what kind of relationship her daughter was in: a nice one. She knew it wasn’t what Kara had dreamed of. Adam didn’t last long. 

Then James Olsen was there. Eliza believed he had always been there, since he moved to National City and she knew all it took was a smile and a greeting. Kara never really stood a chance. She had been there, seeing the two dancing around each other until the inevitable. It was the first time she believed two people could fall in love in the wrong time and, with that, feelings just weren’t enough.  

Being honest, Eliza would never have imagined the scene unfolding in front of herself a couple of years ago. Everything was so domestic it brought a warmth to her chest she couldn’t quite describe. It felt like coming home for the first time since Jeremiah was gone, for the first time in years.  

Because Maggie and Alex had claimed almost the entire couch, leaving just enough space for her to slip between them and the armrest. They are the first ones to arrive at the living room, and they can only watch as James and Winn race inside the room to guarantee their places at the single chairs next to the couch. They fall into easy conversation, while her eyes linger on the doorway.  

Her daughter takes a while longer to come in. Eliza is sure none of the other pair of eyes are on them, but she can’t help it. They walk in side by side, Kara with her head bowed down because of the couple of inches she has on Lena, their bodies almost molded into each other’s side, and the small smile on Lena’s lips because of whatever, Kara told her.  

With no other sits available, Kara puts two cushions on the floor by the couch, settling down with her legs tucked under herself and extending her hand towards Lena, who doesn’t need another moment to accept the offer.  

They never stop holding hands. And Eliza wasn’t stupid not to notice the shared looks, the blushing cheeks and the happy little smiles on their faces. But it’s only when Lena leans over to rest her forehead against Kara’s shoulder and her daughter does the best she can to turn around and wrap her free arm around Lena, lips easily finding her temple as if they’d been too many times before, that Eliza knows for sure. 

She had seen Kara in love before and this, without a doubt, is it. She just doubts Kara has even realized it yet. 

She takes one last look at the two women, at how they try to snuggle even closer, at the low sigh Kara lets out when Lena turns her head enough to brush her lips against Kara’s neck, before she finally opens her mouth to drag Winn into a chat. 

Maybe this is the right time. 

** 

“If you’re reading your e-mails, I promise you I’m throwing your phone away.”  

Lena looks up to the open door, where Kara is standing at the doorway in nothing but a long, white button down and what Lena guesses are boy shorts. She tries to ignore the fluttering on her chest at the thought.  

“I’m not doing anything related to work, then.” 

“Good.” She receives the biggest smile she has ever seen, fingers rapidly reaching up to adjust her glasses on the bridge of her nose. “It’s a break, Lena. It loses its meaning if you spend it working.” 

“But” 

“No buts.” Kara walks in, arms crossed, legs bare, and Lena uses all of her self-restraint to keep her eyes on blue, instead of falling down to tanned skin. “Please.” 

This time, Kara didn’t even need the pout to make Lena relent. She desperately needs to learn how to say no to Kara, because she feels her downfall slowly approaching by every step Kara takes, by every word that leave Kara’s lips, by every smile Kara gives. 

She turns off the Wi-Fi, puts her phone into airplane mode for good measure, before tucking it at the nightstand by her side.  

Kara smiles at her antics, tales long, confident steps towards the bed after she turned the lights off. Somehow, with only the low lights of two lampshades, Kara seems even more at peace. Even more human, without all the weight she has to carry. 

That’s another thing Lena doesn’t want to think about. Because as much as she wanted to be trusted, she understood the need of being vulnerable and having someone to be vulnerable with. That part she was willing to play, even if it meant never being told. 

And she watches, transfixed, as Kara came closer, loose strands of hair glowing at the yellow light that was supposed to make Kara look less… breathtaking. But there were no other words to describe Kara at any given moment. She was utterly breathtaking, no matter the situation. In a quick motion, she slips off her glasses, keeping them just close enough at the nighstand, and under the duvets.  

It feels so natural as if they’d done this a million times before tonight, sharing a bed, sharing so little space doesn’t make Lena feel uneasy. At the contrary, her heart rate settles down and she can’t stop the lazy smile grazing her lips. 

Without another word, she mirrors Kara’s position, lying on her side, hands almost touching at the middle of the bed. It would’ve been so easy to slide her hand a couple of inches to just hold Kara, even if it was something so simple. It didn’t feel simple, though. It felt the most intimate thing they could share.  

Lena forced the thoughts out of her mind when she realizes Kara was talking again. 

“Thank you. For everything.” 

And she understands. She does. Because she hears everything that lies behind the words, the unspoken  _for being here_ ,  _for not giving up on me_ ,  _for caring_ ,  _for helping_ ,  _for not giving up on yourself_. 

It’s not hard, then, closing the distance between them, not when Kara does the same. And their legs end up tangled, faces mere inches away. 

“I know you almost couldn’t come, since you have a lot on you, but it means a lot.” 

“I wanted to.”  _For you._  

“Thank you.” It’s too sincere, Lena realizes then. Like Kara tries to compensate her one secret by being her truest self with everything else. “Would you” she stops herself, takes a deep breath in then shakes her head “sorry, it would be weird. Night.” 

Lena finds out it’s easy, then, once she started acting on her thoughts. Kara is already turning around when fingers wrapped around a thin wrist and tugged at it. 

Wordlessly, without giving it another thought (because she was sure if she gave into reason over emotional, she would never find the courage) she placed Kara’s hand on her waist. With a nod of permission, she slid her body closer to Kara’s, tucking her head under Kara’s chin and fingers in a deadly grip on the hem of a white shirt. 

“Thank you, again.” Kara exhales contently, as an arm slips around her middle, while fingers come up to caress her hair. “I haven’t been able to sleep well since the invasion. Yesterday was” 

“I know.” Lena closes her eyes, she feels the warmth of Kara’s skin brushing against her lips where they rest against her neck. “Me neither.” 

Lena knows Kara’s fingers shouldn’t make her feel so calm and loved. She knows the heavy breathing against her ear shouldn’t bring her comfort. She knows her heart shouldn’t feel this calm at the mere presence of Kara. She knows, rationally, that they were never friends. Never  _only_  friends. 

And that annoying fluttering at the top of her stomach is nothing but a reminder of how good at denial she’s become. Because that feeling has been there for as long as she can remember. She just didn’t want to acknowledge it.  

Because acknowledging it would mean having to deal with it. And that was something she didn’t look forward to do.  

Lena realizes what all the strange looks she’s been getting from Alex mean. 

She’s in love with Kara.  

And Alex knows it.  

She doesn’t sleep that night.  

** 

She slips out of Kara’s hold after three hours of drifting in and out of sleep. Her brain won’t shut up, especially so when Kara has the cutest frown on her face and she readjusts herself on the now empty bed, arms stretching to the place Lena was supposed to be. 

And her brain won’t calm down because all she wants to do is go back, let Kara’s arms hold her, let the intoxicating smell of Kara’s shampoo lull her into a troubled sleep. Unfortunately, her heart seems to be in sync with her head for once, and she feels every beat against her ribcage. It’s unsettling, to say at least. 

There was a time Lena relented the fact she never had much experience on the nuances of friendship. Or dating. Or relationships in general. It had affected the beginning of her interactions with Kara, it had made her confuse the way  _friends_  were supposed to feel. 

She told herself that every innocent touch, every lingering look, every gesture that could be described as more than friendly, the way the words always seemed to be phrased with a deeper meaning between them, God, Lena told herself all of that was nothing but friendship. She never knew what friendship was before Kara.  

 _I’ve never had a friend like you before_ , Lena had said.  _I’ve never had a true friend before_ , is what she meant.  

Couple of years from now, Lena will deny, even if only to herself, that she had mistaken romantic feeling towards Kara with platonic feelings. Couple of years from now, Lena doubts she will be over Kara. She doubts anyone can actually get over her. 

With light footsteps, she turns around and closes the door as quietly as she can behind her. With even lighter steps, she moves her body to the only place she can think of to get peace in Eliza’s home. 

It’s how Lena finds herself sitting in the hammock at the porch at four in the morning.  

When Lena was younger, she used to slip out of her bedroom and go into her father’s study. He mostly just sat at the couch with an open book she could barely understand what was about at five years old. It was the only place on the house she felt like she could just be, the only place she felt completely calm. 

It had lasted until one day Lionel found her. He was never a bad father, he wasn’t the best either. Lionel had sat by her side and he had read for her. It’s the best memory she has of her father.  

Lionel had started to lock his study after that. Lena never found another safe place again. 

Then, Kara Danvers had arrived and Lena found out safety wasn’t just a place, but a person. For her, that person was Kara. 

Looking at the stars (God, she can’t even remember the last time she was somewhere she was able to do that) now, she feels the same wave of calmness she was hit with over twenty years ago.  

It’s a cold dawn, Lena realizes it fifteen minutes after she sat down at the edge of the hammock, pajama shorts not covering enough skin and her stupid college hoodie that’s way too thin for the weather. She welcomes it, though, with a deep breath in that leaves her lungs burning from the cold. 

She doesn’t turn around when she hears the sliding door opening and closing with a soft thud. She doesn’t turn around when she senses the sweet smell of cocoa. She turns her head when the hammock bounces slightly, and Kara is by her side, filled mug being offered to her as she tries her best to wrap a soft blanket around themselves. 

Lena accepts it all. 

And when Kara moves closer to place an arm around her shoulders, Lena curls up around her side and sighs, face buried against Kara’s chest. 

“When the Danvers took me in,” Kara starts and Lena tries her best to look at her face without getting too much space between them. She sees nothing but blue eyes staring at the beautiful, open sky in the same reverent way Lena had “Alex and I had a rough start, things weren’t easy between us, then she found out I used to slip through my window to sit on the roof and look at the stars. She came with me one night, things got easier after that. It felt” 

“Safe.” 

“Yeah, safe. She started making me hot chocolate at the second month, we never talked about it. It was just, I don’t know, one of those things that happened.” Lena didn’t know what to say, silence seemed like a fitting answer for Kara. “You were gone for almost an hour. I got worried.” 

“We used to live in this mansion quite far from the city, when I first arrived at the Luthor’s.” She doesn’t know why she says it, but it seems right, it seems fitting for the timing. “It wasn’t far enough for the sky to be this clear. I wanted peace and quiet, and this was the first place I thought of, it reminded me of times that weren’t that bad. I’m sorry if I overstepped. And that I woke you up.” 

Kara is shaking her head no before she even finishes the sentence. 

“I want you to be comfortable, if this is where you feel like that I never want you to apologize for that.” Kara tugs Lena closer, arm wrapped around a slim waist and sides completely pressed together. Lena exhales shakily at the increasingly unsteady beating of her heart, closes her eyes and tries her best to enjoy the moment of peace. “And I told you, I don’t sleep well without you.” 

She doesn’t know if the statement comes from a sleep deprived Kara, who doesn’t understand the weight her words carry, or if it comes from an over analyzed place, at where she knows what it entails and all the consequences of it.  

By consequences she means the way her breath gets caught in the back of her throat, the way her heat rate gets even more erratic, the way her stomach won’t stop moving around until she can’t take it anymore. 

Lena doesn’t try to look at Kara’s face, she’s not brave enough to do that. She is not brave enough to know the answer to her question. And, from the place her head is tucked in, she doesn’t hear any traces of sleepiness on her voice, only the steady heartbeat. Somehow it’s enough for her.  

Being in love with Kara Danvers was the easiest realization she has ever had. 

Being in love with Kara Danvers was the best thing she has never asked for. 

Being in love with Kara Danvers had the potential of breaking her. Then putting her back together.  

“Does it still hurt?” She asks minutes later.  

She doesn’t know how many, she doesn’t care. But sleep isn’t coming and silence was becoming heavy.  

“What?” 

“Mon-el. Mike” 

Kara lets out a soft “oh”, as if this was the last thing on her mind, as if this had happened years ago.  

It had been eleven months. 

Eleven long months of seeing Kara try and fail at doing better, at showing people she was okay. Eleven long months of late phone calls and way too many nights at her office. Eleven long months of doing her best and still not being enough. 

As Lena thinks about it now, she realizes how many similarities they share. They understand each other. It gives them so much potential, so many opportunities to grow together, to always bring out their best. 

Then, “No.” A beat. “I did. A lot, actually. But a few months after he went away, I understood we wer- he wasn’t good for me, because he brought out my worst. I guess the worst part was losing the idea I had of him, losing a person I could be myself with, someone who reminded me of home. Even the bad parts of home.” 

“You can always be yourself around me.”  

Kara nudges her head until she’s looking up at her eyes. Clear. Open.  _Loving_. And she feels the blush on her cheeks, because it wasn’t meant to be said out loud, she wasn’t meant to be bold. 

And it’s with all the honesty she has ever seen on Kara’s face that the next words come out, in a string of revelation that leaves Lena at the verge of doing something stupid. Something very stupid. Like kissing her best friend. Or kissing her  _and_  telling she’s in love with her, a feeling she has barely come in touch with and is already dying to let out. 

“I can be my best around you.” 

It sure feels like an  _I love you_. 

Lena brushes it off (later she would come to the conclusion she chickened out), sets her head back in the same spot on Kara’s shoulder and takes a sip of her hot cocoa.  

The first time in years she has watched the sunrise (since her over nights in college to study), she has Kara Danvers by her side, Kara Danvers’ hand on her own, Kara Danvers on her mind, Kara Danvers’ perfume around her and the taste of hot chocolate on her lips. 

 _Nothing could be that perfect_ , she reasons.  

When Maggie finds the two of them in the morning, she doesn’t find in herself the courage to disturb them. It doesn’t mean she doesn’t take a picture, just in case she needs it in the future.  

** 

“Do you think they know it?” 

Alex tries her best not to stare again, at least not after such a short notice. But it was hard not to look. 

Three hours ago, Kara had dragged a chair to the open space by Lena's left. It was nothing but a friendly gesture, Lena was her guest after all and her best friend on top of that. But at the mark of two hours and fifteen minutes ago, Kara had taken one of Lena's hands on hers to trace light circles at its back, until, fifteen minutes later, she gave up and intertwined their fingers. Lena never stopped talking to Winn, as if Kara's actions felt completely natural to her. 

At the mark of one hour and forty minutes ago, Lena had leaned in and brushed an out of place lock of hair from Kara's face, then proceeded to brush Kara's cheek with her thumb as she received the biggest smile her sister could muster.  

At the mark of one hour and seven minutes ago, Kara had gotten up to grab a burger from a tray Maggie had just finished making before going back and settling next to Lena and offering,  _offering_ , a bite. 

At the mark of twenty minutes ago, the two found themselves in a deep conversation with Maggie. It had lasted until Kara leaned in and whispered something in Lena's ear that made her giggle, actually giggle in front of five people other than Kara. A commentary that led into shared looks and rushed words.  

Which brought them back to this moment, after Maggie had given up on gtting their attention again and gotten up to stand next to Alex at the far corner of the backyard, where the table with the drinks were settled. 

Their shared spot gave them a perfect view from everything. From James' turn to look at the grill, to Winn and Eliza just walking out of the house to join them one more time, and, finally, to the two undoubtedly oblivious idiots, who, in Alex's personal opinion, didn't need two chairs by the way they stared at each other. 

She shrugs, though, shakes her head before resting her hands at her front pocket.  

"I don't think they have realized it." 

"I think Lena knows and she's just messing with your sister until she gets that Lena has been flirting with her this whole time." 

Alex chuckles at that, takes a step closer to her girlfriend who welcomes her with and arm wrapped around her waist and a kiss on her cheek. She doesn't mention how Maggie had to stand on the toes to complete the action, they have bigger subjects to approach at the moment. 

"Nah." 

"Wanna bet?" She turns to Maggie, eyebrow raised and smirk at the corner of her lips. She could, and it would've been really easy, to just lean down and wipe it away. Alex glares at her instead. "What?" 

"We said we would stop with the stupid bets." 

"It's your sister's love life!" 

"Exactly." 

When they first got together, Alex had thought winning a fight with Maggie would be easy. At first, all she needed was a glare and a long minute of silence to make Maggie agree with her, sometimes she even cheated a bit and used the same pout she learnt from Kara. Back then, Maggie had lost half a dozen of arguments. 

But the weeks turned into months, and the months passed until they became years (almost two, she remembers, and the secured ring on Maggie's finger for the past months is nothing but a reminder of their time together), and Maggie, unlike her when it came to Kara, had learnt.  

Now, Alex didn't always had things in her way in the relationship, and they adapted, got more mature, came into a consensus on their wishes. Still, there were some things Alex would not relent. The bets, in example, especially when they were about her little sister. 

They had been fun at first, an unharmful way to keep their minds busy in the middle of too many things happening all at once. Alex had started looking forward to it. Then, they weren't all that... nice. (Winn took the worst of it in an incident they promised to never mention again.) 

So, when Maggie looks at her with pleading eyes and the smallest pout she's ever seen (it could, and would, rival Kara's), she needs all her strength to keep a straight face. And, if the ringing of her cell is the only thing that keeps her from breaking, she would never admit it. 

The DEO's calls came in the worst times, Alex found out years ago. And she's proven right one more time while she stares blankly at the screen of her phone. She looks at Kara, who's in the exact same position she is in, and can only watch as her sister whispers something on Lena's ear that makes her nod slightly, before getting up and walking towards them.  

"Did they call you too?" 

"DEO?" Maggie asks, they both nod. 

"Yeah, I just don't know what they want me to do. I'm nine hours away from National City." 

"Well, I'm only five minutes away." 

"You'd go?" Her sister nods, a motion that seems more to herself than to Alex, and manages a small smile. "Are you sure?" 

"They need me." And that's explication enough for her. "Can you give me the car keys?" 

"You're flying?" 

"But I already told Lena I had to go to the grocery store because I drank all of Maggie's horrendous vegan milk?" 

"And she bought it?" She raises a skeptical eyebrow, Kara answers with a bright smile. 

"I'm really good at keeping secrets." 

Maggie scoffs at her side, they don't mention it.  

"Can you do me a favor?" The "anything" slips fast from her lips, but Kara's next words topple over anyways, as if she's trying to say them before she loses the courage. From what she hears, that's exactly the case. "Take care of Lena. Not that she can't do that herself, but sometimes, she forgets to do things like sleep or eat, so, if I take too long, make sure she does that?" 

"You really care about her, don't you?" 

It's Maggie who says the sentence that's been on their minds for the past couple of days. Weeks.  _Months_.  

And Kara stops, fidgeting all over at once. Her hands still around the keys she had just taken from Alex, her eyes fix on the two, she squares her shoulder, ready to defend Lena in any capacity. 

But, then again, she also has the warmest smile Alex's has ever seen, she has this glint in her eyes that Alex can't quite place but has already seen before, she has a blush on her cheeks and neck. Alex had seen her like this before, and she knows there will be no answer from a flustered Kara.  

Yet, it's with all confidence that the next words come out of her mouth. 

"No." It's when Alex thinks Kara will just turn around to leave that her sister shakes her head slightly and says "Caring feels shallow compared to what I feel about her."  

That's when Kara leaves, with a fast wave to Lena and a simple kiss on Eliza's cheek.  

But Alex never sees the last, because she's too concentrated on the younger woman barely six yards away, and who keeps her eyes glued to the door Kara just passed. Lena never looks at her, but she doesn't have to. 

"She's definitely handing her gay panic better than you, babe." Alex elbows Maggie's ribs playfully before turning and leaning down. 

"Shut up." 

** 

Lena waits five minutes before going back inside for Kara, only to find exactly what she was expecting: Kara had left, clothes in a messy pile by the floor and glasses on the arm of the couch.  

They needed Supergirl, and Lena knew Supergirl needed them just as much. 

That doesn’t stop her from chuckling as she bends down to retrieve and fold Kara’s clothes, mind already going to the stupid excuses (buying vegan milk can only last a few minutes and she has this suspicion Kara will be gone for hours) she’s bond to listen once Kara comes back. And she finds out she doesn’t mind. Somehow, she doesn’t. Not if it means she’ll be able to hear the little sigh Kara let’s out when she is sure she’s fooled Lena. Lena is a goner. She doesn’t mind about it either. 

She’s just finished folding Kara’s shirt when Eliza joins her in the living room. She closes the sliding glass door behind her as quietly as she can, trying to claim as little attention to them as she possibly can and, at first, Lena looks over her shoulder; to where Alex is still in a light conversation with James; to where Winn is trying to open a bottle of beer with his hands for Maggie as she laughs at him; at where her  _family_  is. 

They don’t notice the absence of the two. And it’s enough to make Lena look at Eliza’s eyes, to find a glint of mischievousness that, for once, doesn’t make her want to flinch.  

And she finds out it’s easy to reciprocate the warm smile, she finds out it’s easy to fit into this.  

“Kara is not really subtle about it.” Lena follows her line of sight, to the white shirt neatly folded on her hands, the jeans lying on the floor, the glasses. She doesn’t even chastises herself for the snort she lets out. “She still thinks you don’t know.” 

“I like to let her think she’s sneaky, but she made a hole through L-Corp's roof last month and there have been complaints about clothes being left in bathroom stalls at CatCo, so it’s getting harder to pretend.” 

Eliza smiles brightly at that, it’s a smile she has only seen on Kara and she wonders how alike they were. Based on how openly Eliza has received her, she thinks that maybe they are exactly the same.  

She sets the shirt on a cushion, making quick work of folding Kara’s pants and leaving them right at its side and turns to retrieve the glasses to be met with Eliza standing next to her.  

Her eyes speak a thousand words she couldn’t say, choosing her words carefully until she settles with “You love my daughter, don’t you?” 

And she’s taken aback, because it shouldn’t be this obvious. She shouldn’t know. No one was supposed to know. Well, Lena had just found out herself, with the warmth that took over her chest last night when Kara didn’t think twice before hugging her by the waist and tugging her closer. 

Her heart wasn’t supposed to beat that fast as she tried to remember herself they were friends. Her mind wasn’t supposed to go back to the night Kara stared at her for a second too long before answering Sam. Her hands shouldn’t shake as she brought them up to rest them against Kara’s forearm and all she could see was the way Kara looked at her as Lena begged her to let her go.  

Sometimes, being ignorant was the best way of self-preservation. She lusted the moments before she knew, she lusted being able to put those thoughts back, to just  _be_. Because now that she knew, she couldn’t unsee it.  

There was something on Eliza’s knowing smile that almost made it too easy blurting out the truth, blurting out that love was too little of an emotion for what she felt. But she knew better than that. 

“She’s my best friend.” The words sound wrong to her ears, they taste bad on her tongue. “Of course I love her.” 

“You know that’s not what I meant.” 

Lena smiles shyly, her eyes fix on the floor as if it was the most interesting thing she’s ever seen. It’s not.  

And Eliza’s hand finds the small of her back, Lena fights back the overwhelming want of letting the tears roll down. Because admitting it out loud is taking one step closer to losing Kara, and that’s something she could never endure.  

But Eliza grounds her, makes her feel valid, makes her feel like everything will be okay at the end. She wonders if that’s what having a mother should be like. It doesn’t help shaking the tears away. 

“Yes.” It’s barely audible, and for a moment it feels like there’s no longer a weight over her chest, because someone else is helping her to carry it. Still, she can’t help but say “I’m sorry.” 

The words don’t match the powerful image Lena has created for herself, the words don’t match the too mature for a still too young CEO façade Lena Luthor puts on every day. They are nothing but a soft admission of the girl she once were, just Lena.  

“What are you sorry for, sweetie?” 

Suddenly it’s too much: the admission, the love she hears on those words, caring, the tears still threatening to fall. It’s all too much, Lena realizes.  

Lena takes a step back and Eliza lets her. When she looks up again to blue eyes, so alike Kara’s, she loses her breath for a second. But she locks her jaw the same way she learnt years ago and forces the words out. 

“I know you don’t want someone like me loving your daughter.” 

“Someone like you?” 

“With a lot of baggage. With the family I have. Bad. Broken.” 

“Oh, honey.” 

She’s hugged before she can take a step back, and it takes all of her self-control not to break. It would’ve been too easy, Eliza has this effect on her. Anything and everything sound too easy. 

“You’re not that. And I am so glad you love Kara, because she needs this. She needs you.” 

“I’m sure she doesn’t need unrequited love. Not again.” 

“No, she doesn’t. And that’s why she needs you.” Eliza loosens up her hold, she leans back enough to force Lena’s eyes back on hers, so she can see nothing but determination and truth. “You might not see it yet, but she is in love with you. I know that because I know my daughter. Sometimes she just takes a little longer to realize how she feels. And, other times, she takes even a while longer to act on her feelings. She’s not the most enlightened woman in the family.” 

Lena manages a chuckle after that, takes a step back to create the much needed distance before it all became more than she could handle, but allows Eliza to keep a hand on her forearm. 

“Now, you should take five minutes on the bathroom to recompose and then meet us outside, because I’m pretty sure Alex won’t save us any food if we take longer. She has survival instincts from growing up with Kara.” With one last squeeze of her fingers, Eliza lets her go and turns at the glass door, already striding to the backyard. She stops, hand smoothly placed over the handle and looks over her shoulder. “This stays between us for as long as you want.” 

For the first time she feels a very welcomed tightness on her chest.  

She wonders if that’s what feeling cared for feels like. 

** 

Lena tries to stay awake, she really does. But the minutes rapidly turn into hours and before she understands what is happening, is already one in the morning and she can’t find any more strength to fight the heavy eyelids. 

It lasts until she feels the slow dip of the mattress behind her and the warmth of the slim body settling down. She gathers all the willpower she has to turn around, fingers easily finding the soft material of Kara’s t-shirt to tug her closer. 

And it’s almost ridiculous how fast they find a comfortable position, with her head tucked under Kara’s chin, lips resting against the tan skin of Kara’s neck, while the latter arms find their way around Lena’s body, fingers dipping just below the waistband of her pants and resting calmly on her hips. 

“Is everything alright?” 

“Shhh. Sleep.” 

She feels the ghost of lips against her temple and she finds it harder to disagree with Eliza. 

Maybe it’s not that unrequited after all. 

** 

Kara is leaning against the kitchen sink the morning they have to leave. It’s way too early for Kara to be in a good mood, because six am on a Monday is just hellish, but she’s not in a bad mood. Not when she has Lena in front of her. 

Not when she has Lena, in a soft sweatshirt and jeans, her glasses still framing her eyes and hair slightly disheveled as if she hadn’t bothered on fixing it after waking up. She looks up at Kara as she cradles her mug of coffee, eyelids dropping from tiredness but, still, she manages to send the smile she reserved for Kara and Kara only. 

It makes her snap.  

Kara never thought she could enjoy the taste of coffee. It’s bitter, it’s strong and even the smell makes her sick. But when the taste is on Lena Luthor’s lips, it has the potential of getting her addicted. 

It doesn’t feel like a first kiss, not on the way her hand easily cups Lena’s cheek as her other hand rest on her waist. It also feels like a first kiss, on the way it’s barely a press of lips and the short gasp it prompts from Lena. 

Their first kiss happens because Kara couldn’t take it any longer, because Kara  _needed_  it after all the times she wished Lena had been the one kissing her. And Kara liked to brag about her lack of addiction (Alex would always scoff and mumble "potstickers"), but, Rao, she was already addicted to the feeling of Lena’s soft lips on hers.  

And she thinks she’s fucked up. Because Lena doesn’t move at first, she hears her heart race and the way her breathing changes, but she doesn’t move. Not until she takes a step closer, fingers grasping at the hem of Kara’s shirt and presses harder, tongue shyly seeking its way out. 

Kara relents. If she had thought about the feeling of Lena’s lips, she surely wasn’t ready for the feeling of Lena’s  _tongue_. She sighs, gets closer still and allows her hands to wander.  

Hands find waist, lower back, the hem of light jeans, up to ribs, collarbones, neck. It’s with a hand at the soft hair on the base of Lena’s neck and the other with its fingers hooked loosely around belt loops, that Lena bites her lower lip for the first time. It’s something Kara never knew she needed. 

There’s a moan, Kara doesn’t know who it belongs to, but it has the desired effect. Kara’s body heaths, her palms start to sweat, her heart beats as fast as Lena’s. And she hears the tiny, little gasps the girl she’s been in love with for weeks ( _months_ ) lets out, she hears her nails raking up her back, she hears the low sound of skin brushing.  

Suddenly, it’s too much, because she hasn’t been this overwhelmed since her first months on earth, she hasn’t felt this much in over a decade. So she takes a step back, a low whine ripping through Lena’s throat, and a simple chuckle from the blonde.  

“Oh.” 

“I’m sorry, I should’ve asked but you just looked too cute not to be kissed.” 

“Smooth, Miss Danvers.” And she has an answer, but then Lena’s fingers start running against the skin just above the waistband of her own jeans, and words become a too complicated concept. “You kissed me.” 

“Yeah, I did. I wanted to do this for weeks.” 

She takes a moment, then, just to look at Lena Luthor, eyes still closed behind the lenses, swollen lips curved into a content smile, the shyest tingle of red threatening to appear on her cheeks. 

Lena Luthor had to be the most beautiful woman she has ever seen. Sleepy, recently kissed Lena becomes her favorite version of the woman.  

“I’m glad you finally did.” 

“Do you want to talk about it?” 

She just shakes her head no, a low humming sound coming from the back of her throat.

“We can talk about this later.” 

Kara couldn’t agree more, especially so when Lena tilted her head and kissed her harder.  

Alex walks in on them ten minutes later, when Kara has Lena pressed against marble, when hands are under clothes and lips are no longer on lips, but exploring newfound skin instead. 

She clears her throat, it still takes two seconds too long for Kara to bring her head up from Lena’s neck and she swears she tries not to stare at the reddening spot just below her jawline. 

“I’m glad you figured it all out, but we’re leaving and Maggie is driving, so if you want to make out for nine hours at the backseat, it’s not my problem.” Lena laughs, Kara can only hide her blushing cheeks by burying her face against a pale neck. “But, please, don’t make out.” 

**Author's Note:**

> Well, happy holidays for those of you who celebrate and an amazing day for those who don't.
> 
> As always, you can find me on tumblr: @BroodyJC


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